Dear Prudence | Advice On Relationships, Sex, Work, Family, And Life

Danny Lavery welcomes Celeste Ng, the New York Times bestselling author of Everything I Never Told You and Little Fires Everywhere. Her third novel, Our Missing Hearts, will be published in October 2022.  Lavery and Ng tackle two letters. First, someone who is trying to find care for her friend’s paranoid mother. Another letter writer is upset that his friend group has befriended his stalker. Plus, a great deal on Sir Micheal Caine’s desk. Resources for caring for the elderly https://www.eldercaredirectory.org/state-resources.htm https://www.agingcare.com/articles/free-services-for-seniors-or-caregivers-156443.htm If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit m

Danny Lavery welcomes Kate Beaton, author of the new graphic memoir Ducks: Two Years in the Oil Sands, which recounts the time she spent working and living in Canada’s oil industry man camps. Lavery and Beaton take on two letters. First, someone who wants to break-up with a partner who spent the entire relationship expecting this to happen. Another letter writer wants to set boundaries with her sister after a long period of estrangement. Plus, a deep dive into Beaton’s new graphic memoir, Ducks: Two Years in the Oil Sands. If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Niko Stratis, a freelance culture writer whose work has appeared in outlets like SPIN, Autostraddle and more.  Lavery and Stratis tackle two letters. First, from someone whose partner’s request for alone time has them feeling single. Another letter asks what is one's parental obligation if your son commits a violent crime.  Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Austin Channing Brown, a media producer and author of the New York Times bestseller I’m Still Here: black dignity in a world made for whiteness.  Lavery and Channing Brown take on two letters. First, from someone in college wondering if they should date someone in high school. Another letter writer is wondering how to mend a friendship they didin’t realize they may have been neglecting. Plus, a listener update! Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Carey O’Donnell, a writer and comedian, who also co-hosts Sexy Unique Podcast.  Lavery and O’Donnell tackle two letters. First, from someone who’s worried that his boyfriend’s family of origin is trying to re-enter his life. Another letter writer is wondering how to be patient with an old friend who keeps crossing the line. Plus, a listener update! Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Kate Duffy, a New York based licensed clinical social worker who has worked as a therapist and clinical supervisor in a variety of settings, including shelters, residential group homes, and outpatient clinics.  Lavery and Duffy take on two letters. First, from someone who needs their bestie to stop giving them advice. Another letter writer is wondering how to confront her brother about past childhood sibling abuse. Plus, a listener update! Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Ty Mitchell, a writer and former gay porn performer based in Brooklyn, New York. He has written for The New Inquiry and Buzzfeed, and you can read his current newsletter, the First Openly Gay Book Club, at firstopenlygay.substack.com. Lavery and Mitchell tackle two letters. First, from someone who’s upset that his friends continue to associate with someone who is considered toxic. Another letter writer is wondering if he should ask to open up his relationship, or simply break-up.  Finally, someone writes in wondering if there is a way around correcting people about their gender. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Jules Gill-Peterson, author of Histories of the Transgender Child and a co-host of Outward on Slate. Lavery and Gill-Peterson take on two letters. First, from someone who is feeling pressured to commit to a relationship from their entire friend group. Another letter writer is worried that they are going to drive their partner away by relying on them too much. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Bridget Todd, the host of the iHeart Radio podcast, There Are No Girls On The Internet, and the founder of Unbossed Creative, a media company that makes podcasts and other digital content to push the needle on social change.  Lavery and Todd tackle two letters. First, from someone who doesn’t know how to live a life beyond working. Another letter writer has a partner who cannot remember when he says hurtful things. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Helen Rosner, a staff writer at the New Yorker, where she covers all things culture, though most of it is about food.  Lavery and Rosner take on two letters. First, from someone who’s upset that their friend is going to college with the goal of finding a husband. Another letter writer is struggling with a new perspective on how her husband courted her.  Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Luisa Beck, a writer, reporter, and producer based out of Berlin, Germany. She’s the creator and host of the Audible Original Dear Poetry. Lavery and Beck tackle two letters. First, from someone who’s attracted to someone, except when they tell stories. Another letter writer is wondering how to become estranged from one single relative. Plus, behind the scenes of Beck’s podcast, Dear Poetry. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes R.O. Kwon, the nationally bestselling author of The Incendiaries and the co-editor of Kink. Lavery and Kwon take on three letters. First, from someone who’s missing a former bestie. Another letter writer is wondering if they should bring her ailing mother Buddist swastika symbols for comfort. Finally, a letter from someone who is wondering if they should stop doing particular thing they do to make cis people more comfortable. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Noah Zazanis, an epidemiologist, writer, and prison abolitionist living in Queens, NY. His writing can be found in The New Inquiry, Pluto Press' Transgender Marxism anthology, and Obstetrics & Gynecology ("The Green Journal"). Lavery and Zazanis tackle two letters. First, from someone hesitating on coming out for fear of never being called the correct pronouns. Another letter writer is wondering if they should walk away from a relationship that they can sense is slipping away.  Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Kashana Cauley, writer for The Great North and the author of the forthcoming novel, The Survivalists. Lavery and Cauley take on two letters. First, from someone who is witnessing their coworkers play a potentially dangerous prank on their supervisor. Another letter writer is uncomfortable with the subject matter of their friend’s novel. Plus, a sneak peek at Cauley’s forthcoming novel, The Survivalists. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Sasha Geffen, author of the book Glitter Up the Dark: How Pop Music Broke the Binary. Lavery and Geffen tackle two letters. First, from someone who is tired of being the only person holding that her friend came out to in their friend group. Another letter writer is trying to make sense of a hurtful breakup. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Miles Klee, a senior staff writer for MEL magazine, and the author of the novel Ivyland. Lavery and Klee take on three letters. First, from someone who wants to tell her friend to stop paying for everything when they hang out. Another letter writer has upset their partner due to her tendency to offer unsolicited pet advice. Finally, Lavery responds to a letter writer who is wondering if they are a trans man. Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Jackie Keliiaa, a stand-up comedian, writer, and actor based in Oakland, California. She currently produces Good Medicine, a live comedy show featuring all Native comedians. Lavery and Keliiaa tackle two letters. First, from someone wondering about polyamorous etiquette, relative to his partner’s partner’s partner. Another letter writer is wondering if he should cut his losses with his employer, or stick with them through a potentially profitable transition. Plus, an update on the letter, “Which Friends? What Benefits?” Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Lindsay Kyle and Robyn O’Donnell, hosts of the podcast, Maladapted, in which they discuss books that have been adapted into movies.  Lavery, Kyle, and O’Donnell tackle two letters. First, from a letter writer being asked to delay their transition because their wife wants to have a baby. Another letter writer wants her mom to stop insulting her ailing dad. Plus, behind the scenes of the podcast, Maladapted.  Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Jane Rice, a civil servant, and Edward Szekely, a radiographer, who live in Edinburgh, Scotland with their 3 year old daughter and 6 year old cat.  Lavery, Rice, and Szekely take on two letters. First, from a young adult who wants to know why he can’t help lying to his parents. Another letter writer is trying to break their habit of using their dead name at work.  Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes writer, comedian Dani Faith Leonard, who recently produced the film, Coast. Lavery and Faith Leonard tackle two letters. First, from a letter writer whose name change is ruffling feathers in her family. Another letter writer is worried about making small talk at their brother's wedding. Faith Leonard shares about producing the films Coast, Lez Bomb, and her live comedy show, Adult Sex Ed. Plus, a listener update! Slate Plus members get another episode of Big Mood, Little Mood every Friday: sign up now! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com Production by Phil Surkis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices