Soft Skills Engineering

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Hi! I’m currently working for a big tech company and I’ve just accepted an internal transfer to another team. At the same time, an external company reached out, offering me a job for a role I’m interested in and twice my current compensation. I’m not sure what to do. The offer from the new company is very interesting and I wouldn’t think twice at accepting it if I still was in my old team. But now that I’ve accepted the internal transfer, I don’t know what’s best for my career: stay with my current company and lose out on a great offer, or go with the new company but likely burn bridges with my current manager, possibly closing off future opportunities to return to my current company (something that I’m open to in the future)? How do I politely but firmly stop a project manager colleague, who has vast open plains in their calendar compared to my Tetris-stacked week as a senior software engineer, from parking themselves at m

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Hi Dave & Jamison, Long time listener, first time google-form filler outer! I work in a hybrid role as a lead developer and manager of a small team (less than 5). I’m new to management and most of ny experience so far has been with smart, motivated engineers. . . UNTIL! My new recruit is driving me crazy, they are clearly very capable, but just do not do the work. They are frequently late for work, frequently sign off early, and constantly evasive when I ask for updates. I have spoken to them about these issues a bunch, and everytime they are apologetic and say they “have some personal issues but are working on it” - and nothing changes. Urgh! I am pretty sure I will have to fire them, but I feel terrible about it! I know I can’t keep them on and pay them to do nothing, but what’s the best way to let somebody go? How do I break the news to the rest of the team? How do I avoid feeling bad for the rest of my life? Yo

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Hi Jamison and Dave! I am not a developer, but my question is hopefully transferable. I sit in between lawyers and developers. I advise on technology that can be applied to legal processes and I support our teams in using a range of platforms and AI tools to be more efficient across their work. I have ADHD (late diagnosis at 22) and often have trouble with executive function, remembering details, progressing large projects with no deadlines, and remembering verbal instructions. Have either of you ever had a neurodivergent person on your team? If so, how did you support them? What environment helped them to work best? Also, what frustrations did you have and how could they have mitigated them? Any help would be appreciated to help me avoid driving my manager insane (I live in constant fear that one day she will snap and I’ll be fired even multiple years in).

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I’m the CTO of a small startup. We’re 3 devs including me and one of them is a junior developer. My current policy is to discourage the use of AI tools for the junior dev to make sure they build actual skills and don’t just prompt their way through tasks. However I’m more and more questioning my stance as AI skills will be in demand for jobs to come and I want to prepare this junior dev for a life after my startup. How would you do this? What’s the AI coding assistant policy in your companies. Is it the same for all seniority levels? Hi everyone! Long-time listener here, and I really appreciate all the insights you share. Greetings from Brazil! I recently joined a large company (5,000 employees) that hired around 500 developers in a short time. It seems like they didn’t have enough projects aligned with everyone’s expertise, so many of us, myself included, were placed in roles that don’t match our skill sets. I’m a web deve

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I’m a senior developer on a small team, and I’m feeling frustrated with a junior developer I work with. They’re smart and perfectly capable, but they stick very strictly to the confines of their assigned work. They’ll finish their tickets, but unless they’re directly asked, they don’t offer to help with other areas, pitch in on shared responsibilities, or step up when the team is trying to work cross functionally. This engineer seems content to stay in their lane and do “just enough.” I know they’re junior, so I don’t expect miracles, but I expect some initiative. This is most frustrating because it’s a small team and it often feels like we’re working with half of an engineer when they disappear into a corner and leave the pressing issues for the senior developers to handle. How can I encourage them (or maybe push them a bit) to see the bigger picture and contribute more to the team’s success without coming across as bossy or microma

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I was on a meeting with a team generally regarded to be pretty annoying to deal with and not particularly useful. The meeting was pretty annoying and not particularly useful. I audibly said to myself after leaving “holy crap what a waste of time.” Turns out I hadn’t left and may not have been muted (?) but I’m really not sure. I left immediately without checking due to cringe overload, so I have no way of knowing. How do I even go about this? I have to meet with this team regularly. My spirit has left my body, this question was typed by the husk that remained. I am almost 2 years into my software development career. A few months ago, I was moved to a team where I was the only frontend developer. My team responsible for maintaining a large, legacy angular project and building a new internal in React tool to support the ML engineers at our organization. Our organization hired some contractors to help with building the new tool, al

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I’m a long time listener to the podcast. Thanks for reading and answering my question! I have over 20+ yrs experience as a manual QA and 6+ yrs experience as a SDET. I’m in a new role as a hybrid manual QA / SDET for a company that hasn’t had QA for a few years. After a couple of months a new hire was added to support a new project in non-development or QA tasks. While waiting for the launch of the new project, senior leadership decided to have this new hire to help me with QA. They have no experience in QA or coding. I spent a considerable amount of time training them, and found it difficult. After a few months my manager told me the hire will transition to lead QA. They will NOT be my supervisor or manager. I will be answering directly to the manager as before. I feel sidelined since I didn’t get hired on as a Sr. or Lead role. I’ve already been left out of numerous meetings catered to team leads only. The new hire is very voc

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Hi Dave and Jamison, Long-time listener, first-time question asker. Thank you both for the wisdom, perspective, and jokes you bring to the podcast. I recently received an inheritance of around $500,000. It’s not “quit your job and buy a yacht” money, but it is enough to reshape my life. I’m in my late 30s, currently working in a senior engineering role. I’ve had a solid run in the world of code, but I’m ready to walk away from it, zero regrets, just done. What’s pulling me now is UX and product design: more creative, human-centered, systems-aware work. I’ve applied for a one year master’s program in UX design, starting in 2026. I’m planning a sabbatical before that to travel, reset, and explore - think trains across Canada, a design conference in Vienna, a food tour in Greece. I’m also investing in short courses and portfolio work during that time. Financially, I’ve been careful: I paid off my mortgage, invested part of the

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I am a data scientist and was recently passed over for promotion to senior because my projects weren’t “senior level” enough, and I do too many ad hoc requests that delay delivery of my bigger projects. I am a go to for VP and C suite level execs in my company and am commonly asked to help with incidents, all of which are main reasons my projects get delayed. At the same time, I am told by my manager that requests from these stakeholders/incidents are more important than my projects. Every time I try to push back and let stakeholders know that a project will be pushed back due to incidents, they all agree it’s the right prioritization. And yet, every single performance review I get the same feedback about too much as hoc work. I would really like to try again for promotion but I feel like I haven’t been able to change my balance of ad hoc work at all (this is actually getting worse), and support from my manager is lackluster - I don’

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I had my performance review two months ago where I scored a “Does not meet expectations”, which I definitely understand, and my manager told me that some of my coworkers had been complaining about me. I’ve been working hard on improving ever since and my manager told me that they were really impressed with my progress and told me that some of my coworkers had expressed similar sentiments. I have now gotten a really good job offer but I’m reluctant to take it. I’m still working on improving myself with the help of my manager and I don’t want to stop working on this. I would also like some more time to show my coworkers that I really have grown before leaving, feels like that would leave behind a more positive image of me. I’m fairly junior still so contacts seem good to have, and better performance does too, and a better job does too. What should I do? :D Listener Michael Q asks, ‌ Hello! I only recently discovered this

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: A listener named Mike says, To what degree do you think it’s appropriate to talk with your peer managers about people that have moved from their team to yours? How much weight do you give their criticisms of an IC that they used to manage that is working out just fine under your leadership? How do you know if it was mostly due to a conflict in their relationship, or if there’s a nugget of truth you need to look out for? Hi, thanks for a great show. I’ve listened to 400 episodes in a year - thanks for making my commute fun! I’ve been at my current job as a software developer for a year. It’s a great company overall, but we rely on a 30-year-old in-house ticket system that also doubles as a time reporting tool. It lacks many basic features, and project managers often resort to SQL and Excel just to get an overview. As you can imagine, things get forgotten and lost easily. Everyone dislikes it, but the old-timers are used to i

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Mr A. N. Onymous says, Hi Dave and Jamison, Long time listened, second time caller! I wrote a little while back with a common new-manager question about how to handle one of my reports who was at the lower end performance wise, but at the top end on the pay scale. I’d been trying to manage it by getting raises for the rest of the team in order to balance things out a bit (and make the rest of the team happy). I did consider Limogeage but having them on the team was better than a vacancy. Fast forward a year or so, and the problem resolved itself when this team member left - or so I thought. We’ve had a few months gap before opening recruitment again, and it turns out this team member wasn’t happy at their new role and has applied to come back. Given they negotiated well with us the first time I’m guessing they’ve had a healthy pay bump at their new role. What should I do? On the one hand I know their performance, they do de

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Albert Nonymous asks, I am the CTO at a small (5 engineers) tech start-up with non-technical founders. I was their first full-time employee and as such have been able to fully form this company the way I want. I’ve worked here for 9 years now and own 10% of the company. I enjoy the tech and the job itself. The pay is ok, not crazy Silicon Valley numbers but pretty good for a country with free health care. However, I started here while still in university. This is still the only job I’ve ever had. I am afraid that my resume will become less valuable the longer I stay here. I still keep up with current trends with hobby projects, but I’m worried that my resume will become less valuable if I ever need to look for another job. Also, I don’t believe this company will succeed in the long run. I am still the only person on the board who knows how our tech even works and I have found myself slacking off quite a bit during the last year

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: One of my employees is probably getting laid off, what do I do!?! I’m a tech lead / manager for a consultancy and a contract reduction means that one of the people I supervise is likely going to get laid off soon! We’ve found new roles for most of my people, but it’s likely that at least one will get laid off. I want to help this person out. How much support is typical for a manager / ex-manager to provide in a job search, and how can I go above and beyond without doing too much? Over the last year, my company has gone through 3 rounds of layoff. The engineering culture has changed dramatically. With the fraction of engineers remaining, I am increasingly concerned that it’s going to be me next. The company’s posture is that everything is “business as usual” and there is nothing to be worried about, but this is what has been said all along. Morale seems to be low with low engagement in department initiatives. I am looki

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Hey, long-time listener, listened to almost all episodes now and have been loving it since day 1!! I am a senior engineer at FAANG and work 45-50 hours a week and have a lot of cross-org responsibilities. I am lucky to have a beautiful wife and two wonderful young children. I guess, you can imagine how difficult it already is to manage work/life; especially because I am working remote from a different timezone with large dilation. I did lots of side projects before I had a family. But I was totally okay leaving all that behind for a great family life. Now, I have been struck by a really cool idea for an AI-based product that intersects with static analysis and my day-to-day work, which I cannot stop thinking about. I am sure that this project would be more than I could handle at the moment without cutting back on anything else. The question now really is, how do people with families and FAANG jobs do side projects? Or do they ev

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I have managed a product for some months now. My previous manager split their team in to mini-teams of 2-3 people. They gave me a small team and plenty of autonomy to own the product and go crazy on it. I had the time of my life as the team lead. I learned a ton and was really developing management skills. My new manager is more hands-on. They want to do things my old manager left space for me to do, like project planning and quarterly planning. Now I feel micro managed when they get involved. I become territorial. It feels like he doesn’t recognize the independence of the mini team. I feel like I’m going backwards and and undoing all the management growth I’ve had, becoming just a software eng who should just keep their head down and work on a task. I don’t know what to do. How do I keep my independence and keep growing, but also get along with the new lead and learn from them in the process? I work as a senior engineer in a large t

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I work for a B2C fintech startup as a senior engineer. Our onboarding funnel has a lot of moving parts due to regulatory compliance and a litany of requirements from various parts of the business. As a startup, we also live and die by optimizing for and demonstrating growth, so we need to gather data from our product and pipe it to various analytics platforms. Finally, we need to offer customer support for high-touch edge cases. All of this is connected together in a very patchwork way between our own code and various secondary and tertiary systems (CRMs, CDPs, data warehouses, etc). I am torn between two ideas. One is that we may very well be doing something “state of the art” in terms of integrating all of this together. The other is that we are engaging in wheel reinvention on a massive and incredibly wasteful scale. I have no way of knowing though, because I am having such a hard time finding holistic accounts from anyone who has done

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Nearly every time certain developers on the team want to address technical debt, they end up just adding more technical debt. Of course, after one round of addressing technical debt, the developers in question believe that yet another round of redesigning and refactoring is in order. This stresses me out for many reasons, as you can imagine, and has led to my productivity dropping to an abysmal rate. I spend a large chunk my time resolving merge conflicts and re-orienting myself in an ever-changing codebase. Do you have any suggestions for me? Hi! I’m a software engineer at a big tech company, and I’m starting to feel siloed in my IC role. I’m getting my work done, but I’m often lost when it comes to the bigger picture. I can’t keep up with what our internal customer teams are doing, what they need, or even what my own team’s priorities are. I’m feeling siloed, and it’s starting to worry me. I know that just being a good IC isn’

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I am a senior software engineer in a big tech/faang company and this week is my first ever on call rotation. My team is doing a lot of CI work, monitoring pipelines and support queues during on call. It is probably not as much of a hassle as on call for product teams, but for me personally on call was the nearest I have ever been to hell. Our on call is not the regular getting pinged when something goes wrong, instead we have to manually monitor a dashboard 12 hours constantly for 7 days as the alarming is quite fuzzy. I am the only EU remote worker that has to adopt to the on call PST timezone. That means, my on call shift goes from 3pm-3am in my timezone. It is day 5/7 and I am down 24 energy drinks already, cause this was the only way to stay wake. Knowingly, that this would be just a short-term tradeoff against health, I am now living through the most explosive diarrhea I have ever had. On top, I am sleep derived, dizzy and every

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: Hey, I am a web developer getting bored of the regular development work. I am interested in finance and the monetary system and due to the overlap of finance and engineering I feel down the Bitcoin rabbit hole and even spiked interest in crypto like Solana and Sui. I am pretty sure most of crypto is a FUD, delulu or straight up scam, yet the technology looks appealing and interesting to learn. So that said, I am still really interested in learning more about crypto and dabbling in the development space of that. Yet, I am hesitant because I fear that this could reflect negatively on me. What do you think? Is a bit of crypto okay or really that bad? Hi Dave and Jamison After five years as an engineering manager, I want to return to coding. But I’m facing a few challenges: First, I worry about leaving my current team. It feels like I’m abandoning the people I’ve been supporting. Should I make this transition elsewhere to avoid