Dear Prudence | Advice On Relationships, Sex, Work, Family, And Life

Danny Lavery welcomes Adrien Behn, the host and creator of A Race Around the World: Based on the True Adventures of Nellie Bly and Elizabeth Bisland. She is also the creator of the popular travel podcast Strangers Abroad, as well as a writer, and live storyteller. Lavery and Behn offer advice to someone who is wondering how to get a good night’s sleep living next to loud neighbors. Another letter writer is wondering how to live with an ex and avoid falling into old argument patterns. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Katie Lawler Turnbull, a NICU nurse of 17 years and a Master's in Human Rights. Lavery and Turnbull offer advice to someone who is wondering if they should attend a codependent support group, now that they’re feeling better. Another letter writer is asking how they should treat a sibling who just revealed themselves as transphobic. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes back Carmen Rita Wong, the author of Why Didn't You Tell Me?: A Memoir. Wong has also written Never Too Real and Never Too Late, and she heads up Malecon Productions, a company focusing on women-led content.  Lavery and Wong give advice to someone who wonders if there is hope to deradicalize their cousin who is sliding far-right. Another letter writer is considering not taking a job, as they are questioning her about wearing a mask. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes writer Rose Tremlett, who co-hosts an optimisation podcast for the online edition of the German national newspaper, DIE ZEIT.  Lavery and Tremlett give advice to someone who is confused about the messages her boyfriend gives her about the possibility of cohabitation. Another letter writer feels guilty about cutting off an ongoing correspondence with someone in prison. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Emma Arnold, a comedian, artist, and beekeeper, who recently released a comedy special and album called MYSELF. She is also the host of the City Cast Boise podcast. Lavery and Arnold give advice to someone who wants to stop feeling dread about aging and the world in general. Another letter writer wants to help a destitute friend in need of support.  Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Leo Briggs and HG Gruebmeyer, who wrote and performed the play CVS, which premiered this past year at the Seven Stages Theater in Atlanta. Lavery, Briggs, and Gruebmeyer offer advice to someone who is growing weary of her bestie’s contant boyfriend drama. Another letter writer is wondering if they should discuss politics within their friend group. Plus, a deep dive on the making of the play, CVS. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Felicia Reich, a nonfiction comedy writer of personal essays and cultural commentary based in Brooklyn, NY. Lavery and Reich offer advice to someone who feels uncomfortable dating one particular person, while exploring sex with multiple partners. Another letter writer wishes an aunt would stop making up stories about her childhood. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Auyon Mukharji, a writer and musician based in Massachusetts. He is a member of the band Darlingside, and is working on an Indian cookbook with his mother, Jyoti. Lavery and Mukharji offer advice to someone who is troubled that his boyfriend resents him for blowing up their friend group. Another letter writer wants his boyfriend to reveal their relationship to his parents.  Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes poet Elisa Gonzalez, whose first book, Grand Tour, will be published this month. Lavery and Gonzalez offer advice to someone who feels responsible for complicating their friend’s life by sparking their interest in transitioning. Another letter writer is wondering at what point would it be less painful to move on from an unsupportive dad. Plus a listener writes in to comment on the episode “Time to Move On”. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Julia Mounsey, a director and writer whose work has been presented at Under the Radar at the Public Theater, Soho Rep, JACK, Dixon Place, and the Deutsches Schauspielhaus in Hamburg. Lavery and Mounsey offer advice to someone who is wondering if they should honor their mother’s request to keep their abusive upbringing a secret. Another letter writer is wondering how to help a friend who is always getting in relationships that keep him unhappy. Plus, a listener's response to the letter “Grandma McGruff”. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Vani Gupta, a speech language pathologist in Sydney, Australia.  Lavery and Gupta offer advice to someone who upset their husband after revealing that her former therapist and her used to flirt in therapy. Plus, an update on the letter “Clingy Sister Syndrome”, which appeared in our September 13th, 2022 episode. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery offers advice to someone who wants to connect to their body as actually part of themself. Another letter writer is troubled that their partner’s partner never pays for anything. Plus, a listener comments about ways to advocate for foster youth. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Kristina Gaddy, the author of Well of Souls: Uncovering the Banjo’s Hidden History and Flowers in the Gutter: The True Story of the Edelweiss Pirates, Teenagers Who Resisted the Nazis.  Lavery and Gaddy offer advice to a bride who’s adoptive mom is upset that her biological mom was invited to her wedding. Another letter writer is wondering how to talk to his fiancėe about the unscientific nature of social media. Plus, banjo origin stories with a cameo from Slate’s own Ben Richmond! Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Dr. Ida Santana, an addiction medicine physician and a writer. She’s on Substack @idasantana where she publishes Osage Orange, Dispatches from the Prairieland. Lavery and Santana offer advice to an educator dealing with transphobia at their school. Another letter is burnt out from supporting their friend, but is afraid to stop. Plus, a listener comment for the episode, “Is She Really Going Out with Her?” Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Chelsey Weber-Smith, the host of American Hysteria, a podcast that explores how fantastical thinking has shaped our culture. Lavery and Weber-Smith offer advice to a daughter who is trying to hang on to her relationship with her also fighting parents. Another letter is noticing that their partner’s low self-esteem is impacting their relationship. Plus, an update from the letter writer “Lost in Transition”. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Allison Raskin, the New York Times bestselling author of the books, I Hate Everyone But You: A Novel, and Overthinking About You: Navigating Romantic Relationships When You Have Anxiety, OCD, and/or Depression. Lavery and Raskin offer advice to a mom who is suspicious of her daughter’s girlfriend’s motivations. Another letter writer wants to reconnect with her sister after an abusive upbringing that led them to living in separate foster homes. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Tracy Leeds Kaplan, the founder of Small But Mighty Media and the executive producer of The Ten News. Lavery and Kaplan offer advice to someone who’s concerned that his friend is getting cut off from the help he needs. Another letter writer is wondering how to let her aunt know the reality of her sibling relationship. Also, a listener update from “Need My Social Sea-Legs”. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Leslie Cohen-Rubury, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and host of “Is My Child a Monster?”, A Parenting Therapy Podcast. Lavery and Cohen-Rubury offer advice to someone who’s parents might interfere with her decision to be a surrogate mother for her friends. Another letter writer is wondering how to tell their mom about being abused by their teacher when they were 16. Also, a listener's response to the “Fairweather Friend Group” letter. Resources mentioned in today’s show: Cognitive Processing Therapy for PTSD - https://cptforptsd.com/cpt-provider-roster/ Dialectic Behavior Therapy - Prolonged Exposure (DBT-PE) - https://dbtpe.org/find-a-therapist The Body Keeps Score - A book by Bessel Van Der Kolk Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big M

Danny Lavery welcomes Halle Kiefer, a Senior ComedyWriter at Crooked Media, and Alison Leiby, a New York based comedian. Together, Kiefer and Leiby host Crooked Media’s weekly horror film podcast, Ruined. Lavery, Kiefer and Leiby offer advice to someone who’s rapidly approaching burn-out at work. Another letter writer is wondering what to do about their therapist, which has started to feel unsafe. Plus, a lightning round letter about how to talk about yourself with new friends without giving up the dark details of your past. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Danny Lavery welcomes Alo Johnston, author of Am I Trans Enough, and co-host of the Wondermind podcast, Baggage Drop. Lavery and Johnston offer advice to someone considering how to reveal their crush, and another letter writer who feels disappointment that their college friend decided to detransition. Plus, a listener's response to a recent letter titled “Vacation Friends”. Need advice? Send Danny a question here. Email: mood@slate.com If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get an ad-free experience across the network and exclusive content on many shows—you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Big Mood, Little Mood. Sign up now at Slate.com/MoodPlus to help support our work Production by Phil Surkis Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices