Another World Is Probable

Members of my community are at the age where they’re starting to die. It seems like every three months or so someone passes away. Some people I’m closer to than others, but regardless, each death leaves an impact. Have you ever played that game where you stand in a circle and hold a piece of yarn while also throwing it to someone else in the circle? In the end, you wind up with a giant web that connects every person to everyone else. That’s what I think life is like. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

In April, I wrote a blog for my professional website called “Maybe It’s You” about how I realized after getting rejected by every single literary agent I queried that maybe the problem was me. This is the companion piece to that blog recognizing maybe it’s not me that’s the problem; maybe it is the other person. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

This is a repost from October 2014 when I was living in Missouri. My recovery mentor often says to me, “God is slow but always on time. When it’s time, he moves fast so be ready.” Today I’m marveling at how true that is, particularly because I’m in a place that has seasons. In the Bay Area, there are two seasons: the dry season and the rainy season. Missouri has a proper spring, summer, fall, and winter. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

Two sports stories from around 20 years ago are on my mind because my friend showed me the videos of them: that of speed skater Steven Bradbury and swimmer Eric Moussambani. Their stories are amazing if you’re unfamiliar with them. More in this week's post.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

This repost is from almost exactly six years ago but is still relevant today. Enjoy. I had a dream the other night my sister, Rosie, and I slept in the same bed. She started hogging all the covers and I yanked them back from her and said, “No. You can’t take all the covers.” It’s not a dream based on reality but nonetheless, it got me thinking about greed, especially as it relates to the world’s resources. A group of people is hogging almost all the resources leaving the rest of us shivering in the cold. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

One of the most striking things for me about being in Australia is not the accent or driving on the left side of the road, it’s their take on security. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

Whenever I share about my upcoming Australia trip, people are genuinely happy for me. I’m taken aback because sharing good news, especially over social media, seems perilous these days. A year or so ago, Glennon Doyle shared a video of her singing on a boat with her friends and family. The next day, she had the single-largest drop in followers her entire time on Instagram. She posited it’s because there’s something triggering about seeing women, especially, happy. That perhaps we’re more comfortable with their pain and suffering. More in this week's post.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

Lately, I’m noticing how much I catastrophize. Catastrophizing is assuming that the worst will happen. It can also be believing you’re in a worse situation than you really are or exaggerating the difficulties you face. What to do about it? More in this week's post.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

I feel contracted about money right now because the situation with one of my highest-paying clients is in flux. Not only that, I’m spending a lot of money all at once for this upcoming Australia trip. I didn’t know what I was signing myself up for, honestly, because I booked the ticket semi-impulsively. My response is wanting to hoard money like a dragon sitting on her riches. “Amass all the wealth! Spend none of it!” In other words, it’s a good time to remind myself of a concept I learned almost exactly three years ago: “It’s not your money.” More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

The new year is typically when many people start to set resolutions of how they want this year to be. They want to change an aspect of their life or behavior. Resolutions abound such as: “I want to lose weight,” or “I want to make more money.” But how do those things actually happen? How can we make a change stick? After all, most people abandon their resolutions by February, and sometimes even earlier, so it’s clear that merely setting the intention isn’t enough. Read more.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

As we enter this new year, I keep thinking about envy. Not the way I normally do in that my chest burns with the emotion, aching to have what someone else does. Instead, I’m thinking about something my former therapist told me, “Someone out there envies you.” More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

My dad told me about a TV show where people try to be the last person to survive in the woods on their own for a chance at winning $500,000. The premise is interesting because it touches on the themes of competition, human versus nature, and also resourcefulness. I get the appeal. But what I don’t get is the lengths people will go to in order to win. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

Artificial intelligence (AI) has been on my mind because as you’re likely aware, the Lensa AI app that creates “magic avatars,” or in other words digital art, went viral and jumped to number one in the Apple App store recently. Not only that, ChatGPT gained more than a million users in five days around the same time. The AI program can create A+ academic papers and Netflix-worthy scripts. It's both exciting and terrifying. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

I’m working on a novel about a 32-year-old woman who is deeply insecure but tries to mask it with false bravado. When I show small snippets of the novel to a writing group consisting primarily of women around my age, the feedback is positive. However, when I show small snippets of the novel to a writing group consisting primarily of women around 30 years older than me, the feedback is negative. Regardless of the changes I make, the experience reminds me you can’t please everyone all the time and it’s not worth it to try. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

The idea male and female wolves compete to become dominant within packs is inaccurate. This competition only occurs in zoos and not in the wild. In 1944, Rudolph Shenkel, a biologist, first observed this behavior of vying for dominance in wolves at a German zoo but in the subsequent years, David Mech studied wolves in the artic and found wolf packs are families. In other words, the “alpha male” is the dad and the “alpha female” is the mom. The rest of the pack follows their lead because they’re the offspring, not because they fought a battle and lost. While I find this little tidbit interesting, what intrigues me more is why the idea of the alpha male and female continues to percolate in our society. More in this week's post.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

My birthday is swiftly approaching and I keep thinking about time. I’m pondering how things happen and when so it seemed only fitting to recycle this post from October 2018. I have yet to see the man mentioned in this post again, but it’s a nice story regardless. Enjoy. This weekend I met someone formerly associated with my yoga and meditation group way back in the 70s when he lived in Atlanta. That may not seem especially remarkable, but it’s literally never happened to me before. I’ve met people who had some exposure to it, but not people who engaged with the practices and then drifted away. More in this week's post.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

A friend said something to me recently that keeps ringing in my ears: “Wealth is not a sign of good leadership.” She’s right. Let’s look at CEOs of companies who are usually wealthy and considered the leaders of their organizations. Instead of being a good leader, it’s more likely they’re a psychopath because roughly 4% to as high as 12% of CEOs exhibit psychopathic traits, studies find. That’s many times more than the 1% rate found in the general population and more in line with the 15% rate found in prisons, according to Forbes. More in this week's post. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

I wrote this post in December 2017 so a lot has changed since then. My sleep is sorted and my health challenges aren’t nearly as taxing as they were before (although I’m still a spoonie). However, some of my dreams still feel far away so re-reading this post brings me comfort. I hope it does for you as well.  So often we talk about our dreams as something to pursue, to constantly work toward, like they’re a marathon to train for. And while it’s true we must take action to turn our dreams into reality, The Retriever reminds me my dreams are ready and waiting for me when I can attend to them. I don’t have to worry about them disappearing like a soap bubble if I’m unable to focus on them at this very moment because they’re not going anywhere. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

What you’re looking for is looking for you. So often when it comes to searching for a job, a romantic partner, a literary agent, etc., we think it’s like looking for a needle in a haystack – arduous and nearly impossible. We think we’re the ones putting in all the effort and if we stop trying, we won’t get what we want. However, what if instead of a needle in a haystack, it’s like a needle and a magnet? Listen for more.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support

On Saturday I sat in the backseat of a car with a moon roof. I stared up at the sky and noticed a rainbow hidden in the clouds. I lowered my sunglasses because usually, that helps me see colors better but, in this case, I was surprised. Leaving my sunglasses on helped me more clearly see the rainbow. It blew my mind a little, to be honest. More in this week's post. And if you're interested in the author I mention later, his name is Resmaa Menakem and his book is My Grandmother's Hands.  --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/another-world-is-probable/support