Archie And Reg

Bubter, barman of the club, had a terribly sad day yesterday. Somehow it was made even worse my Archie and this could well explain the predicament that both he and Reg now find themselves in...

It's a sad day at the club. A man's best friend is his dog and Archie's pet pooch has passed on. The orphans are relieved,

A brief catch-up in the club leads to some confusion because, at the end of the day, there are just far too many people in the world.

Noel Edmonds has left the club, but he's left his box behind! Archie and Reg cannot resist a quick look inside but are they ready for the horrors that lie within?

At the height of the Arab Israeli crisis Fulton the Twitcher found a remarkable way to save petrol. Or waste it. Either/or.

Memory turns to Dirty Steve back at school and just how he came to have that horn sticking out the top of his head. At least he got to put his hand in the dogs mouth.

It's only a tongue twister. It really doesn't stand up to analysis. But that has never stopped Archie when he's in a pedantic mood...

Archie has made a culinary discovery. Except he hasn't. And he may have already killed for it.

Reg is rather cross because someone is drinking a soft drink in the club! The entire concept of non-alcoholic drink is far too much for Archie to cope with, but not as difficult as the concept that haunts his childhood memories...the concept of The Man.

Branagh, Parton, Chaplin, Hitler: one thing in common, and the chances are the animal rights people will want a word...

A simple game of I Spy proves to be rather more revealing than anyone might have suspected!

It is not unknown for people to bring their pets into the club, however there was one occasion when a Monkey caused quite the furore. Then again, there was the time with the politicians Labrador.

Johnny No Legs. But why?

Uncle Albert ran away to spend his life with Seamen at a very young age. He did, however, return home on occasion. On one such occasion he brought young Archie a mysterious present from the Orient...

Archie and Reg are startled to notice the Piano player at the club, even though they've been tickling the ivories since VE day. The only question is, who is he? Or she?

Mr.Mallory is well remembered for having nine fingers instead of ten. He lost one whilst visiting Matron in her room when he accidentally stuck the wrong thing in the cage...

Reg has an issue and it must be sorted forthwith. It is in the trouser area. Archie has an issue also. It too is in the trouser issue.

Whilst enjoying a drink or two memories take our titular pair back to the 1930's. A time of administrating torture and a particularly tricky secret mission behind the enemy lines in Nazi Germany. And there's a dirty joke about semen.

Archie is not talking to Reg. This could have something to do with the fact that The Pope was in town the other day and this coincided with some heavy drinking...

Sean Connery was a strange chap. He never seemed to know what was going on.