Fostering Voices Podcast

This is the 'Thirst Buster' episode (44oz of sugary carbonated goodness!) Something that is as good as a thirst buster in our home is Cate! She has been living with us for 4 months, and things are just getting better and better. This is because we all have an attitude of trying to out-serve one another. I feed Cate, and she cleans and helps with the kids. It's a perfect symbiotic relationship! The best symbiotic relationships are like this this, and they require people to be vulnerable, humble, and not self-centered. We have admittedly struggled with this in the past (especially as brand new foster parents). But we are pleased to admit that we are growing and acting like buttholes less and less! Progress! So, are you a part of great relationships? Or do you often feel like you are waiting for people who 'owe you' something? Whether it's lunch, watching your kids, or telling you how amazing you are? (Seriously. Check your heart!) The (Good) Word of the Day: "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. 

Tax season is officially upon us, and so we decided to have the best tax preparer in all the land join us for an interview. We are thankful that Wes Watson (who happens to be Chris' dad) was able to make time for us, so he could share everything related to taxes for foster and adoptive families. In this episode we talked about: The Keymaster from Ghost Busters. This is what happens when Chris has someone else to talk about obscure movies with. We also talked about how if you have had a child in your care for more than 6 months, you are able to claim them as a dependent on your tax return.  It can be VERY annoying trying to get your foster child's Social Security Number, so start asking your case worker NOW so that you have it before April 15th! If a child was born after June, and wasn't officially in your home for more than 6 months, BUT was in your care for most of their life, you still get to claim that infant. There are changes to many tax laws. The new federal standard deduction for a couple is $24k. HOWE

This episode is all about heart change and the times we have seen God move and change hearts. We've experienced lots of examples of God changing hearts in Jihae's parents. Starting with being ok with Jihae and Chris getting married, to being excited to have adopted and foster grandchildren. This is not always something that is easy for everyone, but lots of prayer and patience helps! Often times we tell ourselves that we cannot do something - from being able to birth a baby without an epidural, to not being able to love a kid who isn't biologically our kid. But when we say we can't do something - then we are right. We can't. But the opposite is true too - when we say we can - then we can!   The Good Word of the Day: "Watch over your heart with all diligence, For from it flow the springs of life." Proverbs 4:23 Other versions say to "Guard your heart", and too many times we guard our hearts too defensively. Sure we don't want to let bad things into our hearts, but we also don't let good things into our hearts

We are back from a 6 week break, and ready to dive into Season 3! We hope that everyone had a delightful Christmas break, and start to 2019. We ended off the year with 2 kids in diapers, and we are starting off the year with 1 kid in diapers, and 1 kid who pees and poos in his undies on occassion... small victories/failures. This episode starts off with us talking about how our 2018 goals went. Then we break into some goals we have for this coming year.  If you have a goal to be healthier this year, and need a coach, we know some REALLY great ones! Kevin and Bekah Tinter are some of our dearest friends, and they happen to be amazing health coaches. You can connect with Bekah on Facebook, or Kevin, or email them (kevin@tinterhealth.com, bekah@tinterhealth.com ) to get more information. We support the work that they do, and they support the work that we do, which is why they are hosting a GIVEAWAY!!! Check out our social media for more details! A new thing you will hear on the podcast this year is our 'Time of

Episode 39 is for you, Greg Ostertag, because you wore 39 on the Utah Jazz, and because when we first got our current foster baby, he looked like you. And then he evolved to look like Winston Churchill. Anyway, this week is a continuation of last week's interview with Christie Priem. If you have NOT listened to episode 38 yet, please go and do that, and then come back to this one! We are finishing up keys 4,5, and 6 to detecting developmental delays in children. Key #4: Appropriate Sensory Processing  -Many children have different sensory needs that often go unrecognized, and we can help meet those needs to help kids be calmer, and more focused so that they can be ready to learn. -The sensory system has 8 recognized parts:  Visual Olfactory (smell) Auditory (hearing) Gustatory (tasting) Tactile (touch) Proprioception (input to joints, ligaments, tendons) Vestibular (sense of where body is in space) Time (sense of time passing) Interoception (sense of what's going on IN the body) -Sensory seekers are kids who

Episode 38 is dedicated to you - Curt Schilling, of the World Series winning Diamondbacks, with your bloody sock and all. This week's episode features an interview with Christie Priem, an incredible Speech Language Pathologist (SLP). She is also the founder, owner, and genius mind, and loving heart behind Chirp : an online resource to make churches welcoming for those with special needs. Christie has used this verse to guide her in the heart of her ministry: "What is the price of five sparrows - two copper coins? Yet God does not forget a single one of them. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows." (Luke 12:6-7 NLT) . She is caring for the fragile, and often over-looked community of special needs kids, because they are of great worth to Jesus!  In this interview: Our interview with Christie, she shares 5 Developmental Keys (plus a bonus one!) to help parents, and anyone who works with children, to recognize developmenta

Episode 37 is dedicated to Rodney Harrison of the New England Patriots (Reggie knew that off the top of his head), and Metta World Peace, aka Ron Artest.  Random fact:  'Metta' means loving kindness and friendliness towards all, and is a traditional Buddhist word. He chose this name 'to inspire and bring youth together all around the world." So special. Important facts about Reggie and DCS: - Reggie actually entered the world and entered the DCS (then CPS) system. He lived with his mom until he was 7, and then he was able to be raised by his older sister and her husband. Reggie is the 8th of 10 kids. - CPS means Child Protective Services, and DCS is Department of Child Safety - Having worked at DCS since 2010, Reggie has done every kind of job there: investigations, high profile cases, mentoring, supervision, and now he is a data technician as well as office notary. He loves this new position because he gets to support case managers and supervisors Some Promising Foster Care Stats in Arizona: - in May 2017, t

Shaquille O'Neal wore number 36 when he was a newbie basketball player on the Orlando Magic. We love Shaq, especially when he was a Phoenix Suns for a brief moment in time. He wore 32 then, and he promised he would bring a championship to Phoenix. We are still waiting... This week we talk briefly about three tips for people who are thinking of embarking on their foster care journey, or have just commenced. Knowledge is Power. Whether that's knowing the reunification rates in your state, or knowing other foster families, or knowing as much as you can about what you are getting yourself into. Knowledge is truly going to be a good friend throughout your foster care journey. Compassion for your Spouse. Whether you are the driving force of the desire to be involved in foster care, or you are the one who is at home with the kids for most of the day, this is a very necessary step in being success. This isn't the End. Sometimes people are reluctant to start the journey of foster care, because they think that means it

This is the Kevin Durant episode. Not because he was adopted or in foster care. Just because he is awesome and wears the number 35. And we love him. This week we interview the lovely Rhonda Labatt of Redemption Market, a stunning ethical boutique that literally changes people's lives. Maybe not so much the customer's, but definitely the artisans behind the products. Rhonda has a huge heart for serving and loving the least of these, which is what led her to adopt her youngest daughter from Peru. Listen to this week's episode to find out more! Some points that Rhonda mentioned: - An Open Door Adoption Agency , this is the agency that Rhonda went through - $25,000 for this international adoption (7 years ago), but thanks to so much provision and generosity from others, they spent about $5,000 out of pocket. - This adoption from Peru took 2 years, with a 5 week stint in Peru for the whole family, as a requirement for the adoption. - Her devotion to Savina's birth mom, to the pastor who helped at the orphanage, to

This week is Charles Barkley week. Since apparently we are just going to reference our favorite basketball player every week. Though seriously, we talk about "How to Raise and Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success" by Julie Lythcott- Haims. She has a great TedTalk that you can listen to here, or you can purchase the book here. It is a wonderful book that really has given us a lot to think about as we are raising all these kids, and what the negative repercussions of overparenting look like. For example, she talked to the creator of this viral video: We are Millenials. We Suck, and we're sorry. And it's hilarious, and it's the face of what goes wrong when you overparent and raise entitled kids.  So, how should you parent your kids to be adults? Read this book. Listen to this podcast. Talk to your friends. Make some changes. Although, we said something in this episode which can easily be misconstrued, so let me clear the air here: When talking about what we want for our fo

Episode 33 is another great one, featuring an interview with the delightful and smart Maggie Zehring.  But before we dive into the goodness of that interview, Chris and I got stuck in the intro about the number 33, and what it has meant to Chris in his life. We referenced Larry Bird, who was in fact from French Lick, Indiana, as Chris mentioned. But he was actually born in West Baden Springs, Indiana. Patrick Ewing had some very colorful shoes when I was in High School (which was 20 years ago), and shockingly still sells them! This is brand new information! You can buy some here if you are interested. But if you want to be true to the fashion of 1990s, your jeans better be gigantic, and the same color as the shoes. Now, onto the interview! The basics about our guest today: Maggie is married to a great guy named Nick. Together they have 2 bio baby boys, and a foster son smack dab in the middle of the boys. The kids are all 8 months apart. And the eldest isn't even 3 yet. And Maggie is pregnant. And adorable. Y

We went to Rocky Point, Mexico for Fall Break (something that happens here in Arizona. We get 2 weeks off in October, and it's the best!) We opted not to travel with our 5 month old, because - it's the beach. Not the best place for a fair skinned sand eater. So, we left him with two friends of ours - neither of whom are licensed foster parents. Although one of them is in the process. But this goes to show that you can leave your foster babies with people that you deem to be safe, and good care providers. Traveling without your foster child: If you don't have people who can watch your foster kids while you travel, you can tell your licensing worker, and they will find a respite provider (someone who is licensed to provide respite, usually another foster family) for you. The main difference here is that a licensed respite provider will get paid HANDSOMELY for watching your kid - about $1 an hour. Which is about $24 a day. Don't do this for the money people!  So, the main thing that you need to leave with your r

This week's episode is not for little kids' ears! But it is one for husbands, wives, moms, dads, and teenagers. And is definitely a discussion topic for you and your pre-teens. It's a good reminder to also mention that this is not a topic solely for those in the foster/adoptive community. There are many children that come from hard places that have had egregious sins committed against them, but in the realm of pornography and masturbation - this is a topic that affects everyone. Even if you don't believe me. One scary and true thing that was said in this episode is that your children may not be looking for porn - but porn is looking for them! This is a multi billion dollar industry that wants to find new addicts.  We have Robert Watson as our special guest this week. He is a pastor at Sun Valley Community Church, and he delivered an awesome sermon on this topic last year. You can find it here, but he shares all the main points on the podcast today. This is not just a typical sermon. This is a science lesson a

This week's episode is a short one! We read somewhere that most people like to tune un for 20-30 minutes. So, we are giving it a shot! This can't be our norm, since we interview people, and we want to hear as much of their stories as possible. But when we can, we will try to keep the episodes between just Chris and I, less than 45 minutes? Ok? No promises though. We are Chatty Cathys. So the heart of this episode is to have a focus on how you want your kids to turn out. We have a motto for our Small Group, which is "Raising kids who aren't A-holes". And it's funny, and it's true. But after talking with our wise friends, the Worcesters, they told us we need to focus on what we DO want our kids to be, not on what we DON'T want our kids to be.  What we don't want our kids to be is too broad and too vague. But when we have a specific goal for our kids, it is easier to direct them in that manner. The Worcesters also mentioned that some of the most successful people are Kind, Compassionate, and Forgiving. So that's

This week we have an amazing interview with Tia Thompson, an incredible woman, who has an incredible story. Or stories. There are so very many stories. But this week we are just focusing on a few of hers. But, before we jump into the interview, in the intro, we give one life hack, and that is to pursue your passions with all of your heart! Chris read "Crushing It" by Gary Vaynerchuck, and so he was feeling particularly motivational this week!  In the rest of the podcast, we talked about: - Adjusting and adapting! We adjust from being single to married, then again when we have one kid, and then when we have more kids. Tia is the queen of adjusting and adapting. - Part of her story is that her husband has advanced ALS, is homebound, and communicates via fancy computer that he operates with his eyes! He is incredible! And so is Tia. And so are their girls. They don't complain about anything, because this is their one and only glorious life. We could all learn so much from their example! - Tia adopted her three g

This week's episode deals with Life Hacks for your home, so that every person in your home can experience just a little more peace. Cause we all need more peace, right? Especially when you have 7 people living in that house.  So, Life Hack 1: Chores and Money. We recently read a blog article by our friend, Grant Botma, about what he does with his kids. He's a financial expert, so we knew it was going to be good. You can read it here. He discusses how he does not give his kids an allowance, or pay them for chores that are expected of them: "These are cleaning messes you make, doing your laundry, your dishes, and other household chores that are part of being a household member. When my kids are eventually on their own, they won’t get paid to do their own dishes or laundry. As a result, these are tasks they need to do without financial incentive." You just have to read the whole article. Or watch this video. It's so good. We are also trying to teach our kids about taking initiative, budgeting their money, and be

Today's episode features the voice of Donise, a 62 year old foster and adoptive mom. Her tale is a very unique, and absolutely amazing, with major hardships and tragedy mixed in for good measure. Donise has 5 grown daughters, and adopted 12 and 11 year olds, and 3 littles ages 2 and under. And they also happen to be medically fragile. This is why this episode is called 'Interview with Saint Donise' . I hope you will enjoy this episode. And I ask for some grace as there are 2 babies present during the recording. Real life people! I am interviewing real foster parents, and they really have real foster kids living and growing and thriving in their homes! In This Episode We Talk About: - A short life is not an incomplete life!  - That as foster parents, we don't always know where a child should go, and more often than not, we shouldn't interfere with that process. There are natural connections that happen, to be sure! But all in all, we can have peace with placements when we just leave it all in the Lord's hands.

In this week's episode, we talk about how the imprints of love that our parents and family that we grew up with, affect us in our adulthood. We talk about all of this through the lens of the book "How We Love" by Milan and Kay Yerkovich, which is EXCELLENT and we Highly recommend it. You can find it here. But if you aren't much of a book reader (and of course they have it on Audible.com, which is great since that's how we read it) you should at the very least go to their website. You can find their quiz HERE, and see what your love style is. The five categories are: Pleaser, Controller, Avoider, Vacillator, and Victim. Chris and I are both in the PLEASER love style, which you would think is amazing. But it has it's downfalls for sure. Like, some Pleasers do things for others - to make themselves feel better, not to make the person that they are serving feel better.  Soul Words are words that seem so obvious to some, and impossible to articulate for others. You can find a list here. Maybe it will help to have

Episode 25 features an interview with Rilie Norton who is truly one of the sweetest and most gentle humans I have ever met! She is a bio mom to Ivy (9) and McCoy (3) and foster mom to two sweet kiddos (5 and 1). Rilie brings new elements to the podcast as she talks about her experience with ICWA (Indian Child Welfare Act) kids, which is a first for us! Rilie shares that something she wishes she was prepared for was the massive schedule adjustment, especially in the first few weeks. Doctor appointments, case worker visits, and so much more!  Enjoy this episode! In this episode, we mention: -Stewardship  where Rilie's husband works, and where we do all of our mortgage, insurance, and financial stuff. They are a company that truly loves the people that they serve, and are interested in saving You money! -Child Crisis Arizona where Rilie is licensed as a Foster Parent. Click here to find out more! -Ivy's Bookmarks! You can find her Instagram here. Or you can order one or some at ivysdreambookmarks@gmail.com! -Ril

In our time as parents, we have 'raised' 0-4 year olds for the last 11 years. The full count would be 7 kids for 3 months or more. We've done the newborn thing six times, we've done the toddler thing five times, and we've also done the two toddlers who were 14 months apart or less - twice. Neither of those times were particularly pretty. But when we say we have some advice to give on surviving, And Thriving, in those early years, we mean it! Tip #1: Don't be a reactive parent- as in, don't start teaching/forcing your kid a new skill just cause some other kid is doing it. Getting into pissing contests with other parents just make you feel bad, and they make your kids feel bad too.  This pertains especially in the realm of potty training. Which we talk about the potty, and poops A LOT in this episode. Sorry in advance for that... Tip #2: Don't try to do it all. As a mom, I felt like I needed to be a part of every bath time, every bed time routine, every single moment of my baby's life. This is more plausible wh